In Love with this Moment

I was sitting in my room when I heard it. I heard the unmistakable sounds of beautiful South African voices singing.

Not knowing where the sounds were coming from, I venture outside. Before I know it, I find myself sitting on the ground, listening, and falling in love with the moment.

The weather is perfect – not too hot and not too cold. Wispy clouds fill the nighttime sky. I can see the moon and a few stars peeking through.

The singing continues, coming from a house across the street. I may never know if it was a choir rehearsal or simply a group of people who decided to sing together. Whatever the purpose, the outcome is beautiful. Gaps between songs are filled with discussion and laughter.

A few houses down from the singing, two boys play with a soccer ball. In the distance, I can hear the joyful shouts of more children.

In addition to the noises made by people, the nighttime sounds of nature are also present. I hear the constant chirps of crickets, the buzz of other insects, and the soft whoosh of the light breeze.

I am lost in the moment, overcome with the beautiful sounds of singing, laughter, and nature.

Before I know it, I am brought back to reality by the loud sound of a train passing. I have spent the last thirty minutes lost in the sights and sounds around me. I have spent the last thirty minutes thinking, listening, watching, and thanking God for making sure I experienced this moment. I have spent the last thirty minutes in awe. I have spent the last thirty minutes feeling a wonderful sense of peace and joy.

I am in love with this moment.

Everyday Experience #1 - Laundry

Doing my laundry here wasn’t something I really thought about before I arrived. At home, it was such a normal, everyday experience that I didn’t put much thought into it.

During in-country orientation, new questions kept popping into my mind, such as “Do I have to provide my own toilet paper?” “When a light bulb goes out, where do I get a new one to replace it?” and “How will I do my laundry?”

For the last question, Tessa (my country coordinator) said something like this. “There is a washing machine there for you to use, but I was told that it also requires some ‘manual labor’ to wash your clothes.”

What??

Based on that answer, I had no idea what to expect. I was honestly picturing myself having to literally shake the machine to imitate the churning of clothes inside. For something that I never gave a second thought, the thought of doing laundry was suddenly daunting.

When I arrived in Soweto, I asked the German volunteers here for advice on doing laundry. They said that there is a washing machine for the volunteers to use located directly behind our flat, but it is broken. Luckily, there is another machine, but we have to share it with other people, so sometimes it is hard to find a good time to wash. Finally, the machine works pretty well when actually washing the clothes, but it struggles during the spin cycle.

When I needed to attempt my first load of laundry, I had Giulia, my flat mate, show me how to run the machine. She said that I should turn on the machine, push every button once, and then hit start. I have no idea why we have to push every button once, but I just go with it and it works pretty well. After starting the machine, I wait for about 45 minutes, then go to check.

                                                  The working washing machine, located 
                                                                  just outside of the main kitchen at DAM.

Usually, I find my clothes sitting in a pool of water. This shows that the wash cycle is complete, but the ever-cumbersome drainage and spin cycle is struggling to begin. One of my neighbors said that the best way to make the spin cycle work is to have a small child sit on the machine. Since I am lacking in the “small child department” I simply lean on the machine and put pressure on the lid, which usually makes it spin for about two minutes before it stops again. This process of leaning, spinning, stopping, and leaning again continues until 1) my clothes are no longer soaking or 2) I am sick of leaning on the machine. Usually it is the latter.

Finally, it is time to hang my clothes on the line outside. Our clothesline is located just behind my flat in the garden. So far, it has been pretty windy here, which is good for quickly drying clothes, but creates a new challenge for keeping my clothes on the line and off the ground.

                                        Some of my laundry hanging on the line behind our flat.

I have discovered which clothespins are the strongest, and therefore work best for heavy items, such as jeans.  I came upon that discovery after having many items fall from the line onto the dry, dusty ground, which caused the items to now be muddy and almost as dirty as before I started laundry.

Luckily, the warm and breezy weather makes for very fast drying. For most items, about an hour on the line is enough. For others, I must leave them out there longer, and hope to remember to get them later. Fortunately, I live with some pretty great people who bring my jeans to my door should I forget them on the line for an extended period of time.

I have heard many stories about fellow YAGMs learning how to properly hand-wash their clothes, and I am extremely grateful to have the almost-fully-functioning washing machine that I have. In the few times that I have hand-washed my clothes, I think they end up smelling worse than before I started washing them.

Basically, doing my laundry here is different than it was back home, but I have learned to adjust and be flexible. Isn't it strange how even the most mundane activities can teach us lessons in life? Way to go, YAGM program. I have even learned lessons by doing my laundry.

J

Grace Space

During orientation in Chicago, we compiled a list of rules for our time together.  One of these rules was to “allow some grace space for yourself.” Basically, this means that you shouldn't be too hard on yourself. This rule was very helpful during orientation in Chicago and during in-country orientation as well. However, I have found that the idea of “grace space” has become even more prevalent and useful lately here in Soweto.

Throughout much of my YAGM experience so far, I have been feeling inadequate. During Chicago orientation, I was feeling in awe of the other YAGMs and feeling like I didn’t fit with this group of amazing people. During in-country orientation, this feeling was intensified. The other South Africa YAGMs are such inspiring and great people; how could I possibly belong in this group?

Here in Soweto, I have been wondering if what I am doing is enough. Am I working hard enough to step out of my comfort zone? Am I trying hard enough to learn a new language? Am I being open enough to create new, lasting relationships? Am I actually teaching the children anything? Questions like these seem to be constantly running through my mind.

When I am feeling overwhelmed with these doubts or feelings of inadequacy, I remind myself of our rule during orientation:

“Allow some grace space for yourself.”

Although nothing that I do ever seems to be enough, I know that God has provided me with the strength and courage to do exactly what needs to be done. I must learn that “being" can be more important than “doing.” After all, “We are human beings, not human doings.”

I must remember that I am who I am for a reason. I am here in Soweto for a reason, even though that reason may not ever become clear to me. I must constantly strive to be my best, but not let that get in the way of living. The relationships I have built and will continue to build are important, both to me and my community. Although I may not see it every day, my presence here is noticed and important. God entrusted this role of YAGM to me, and I must have trust in that plan.

Dear current, former, and future YAGMs, friends, and family, please don’t forget to allow some grace space for yourself. You are all beautiful people with a wonderful purpose in this world. You are loved, cared for, and relied on more than you know. Don’t allow yourself to feel inadequate as compared to others. You are unique and incredible in your own way, and that’s what makes this world such a wonderful place.

Is that Zulu or Sotho?

The title of this post displays a question that I have asked more times than I can remember. From my experience so far (three weeks already - woah!!), most people in my area speak either Zulu or Sotho (pronounced Soo-too). However, I am still fairly slow at recognizing when either language is being spoken. For the most part, the people at DAM speak Sotho, so most of the time I can just assume that is what I am listening to. At the mall today, however, a salesperson started a conversation with me and tried to teach me how to say "How may I help you?" This was when my "go-to question" came out. Turns out, she was teaching me Sotho, which was a relief for me because that is what most people have been trying to teach me. Rather than attempt to learn both Sotho and Zulu, I think that one new language is enough for me. :)

In my short time here, I have become partly fascinated and partly annoyed with languages.  I am fascinated because I have sat in on so many conversations of which I had no idea what was being discussed. There have been many times when I have been the only person who doesn't speak the language at all. I have had people try to teach me words, then chuckle when I try to pronounce them. I am also frustrated because I have noticed that I am literally the only person I know here that only speaks one language. Every South African I have met speaks their mother tongue as well as English. The German volunteers I work with speak German and English. I only speak English.

To add to that frustration (and fascination), the English I grew up with is not the same as what is spoken here. I have created a list of a few examples, which is both amusing and confusing for me and others:

-It's not "I have to go to the bathroom," it's "I have to use the toilet."
-It's not "over there," it's "that side."
-It's not "six thirty," it's "half-past six."
-They aren't "diapers," they are "nappies."
-They aren't "french fries," they are "chips."
-It's not "pop," it's "cold drink."
-It's not a "sweatshirt," it's a "jersey."

These language differences, whether between American English and South African English or between English and Sotho, are both barriers and opportunities. This experience is giving me the opportunity to learn a new language (or two?!) as well as discover new ways of communicating.

I'm hoping that my time here will open my eyes and ears to the multitude of languages around me. I pray that I become more comfortable with using Sotho in conversation, and that people continue to be patient with me as I learn. I also hope and pray that people don't get annoyed with me as I continually ask whether they are speaking Zulu or Sotho. :)

-Emily

P.S. I have been given a Zulu name! It is Nhlahla, which means "lucky" in English. I have only recently been able to pronounce it, and there are some people who only refer to me as Nhlahla! Cool, huh?

Learning to Live

I have heard it said that South Africa is where first and third worlds meet. Based on my experience today, I found that to be true.

The Orphans and Vulnerable Children (OVC) department, one of the areas where I devote a lot of my time here at DAM, held a retreat for its staff in Joburg. Personally, I was so excited to go into the city and experience something new. However, I was surprisingly affected by the stark differences between my little neighborhood in Soweto and the area of Joburg that we visited.

                                            Here is a shot of a few of our group members and the park

                                                           where we spent the afternoon. It was a beautiful place

                                                           and a great experience, but it stirred up some interesting

                                                           and unexpected emotions.

In one short week, I have become fairly comfortable with the area where I live despite the fact that it is very different from what I am used to at home.  It is not filled with mansions and sports cars, but instead with modest homes and wonderful people who have graciously welcomed me into their community. While driving through Joburg and seeing many houses and cars nicer than ones at home in Minnesota, I was surprised and confronted with the income disparity here in SA. 

It also hit me that this income disparity is present throughout the world. While the extremity of this phenomenon varies, there are always people in need and people with excess. Many times, these two extremes are living in close proximity geographically, but can be portrayed as being light years away.

As Christians and as citizens of the world, I think our challenge is to recognize these disparities and find creative ways to engage our neighbors, regardless of their situation. Giving money to charity is usually the first thing people think of when considering ways to assist the poor, but I think it is even more important to simply live with and learn from others who are in different economic and social situations. The citizens of the world must learn how to live together in mutuality and respect before any injustices can be solved.

Lord, please give us the strength and courage to engage our neighbors. Help us to live together in mutuality and respect. Let your light shine through anyone and everyone we meet, and help us to recognize that light when it is almost blinding us. Be with the citizens of the world as we learn to live with all of humanity. Amen.

Incredible People, Incredible Words

Since arriving here in South Africa on August 23^rd, I have met some pretty amazing people. They are full of wisdom, courage, joy, and so much more. I am constantly amazed at the words and phrases that come out of their mouths. Due to this wealth of knowledge that I have come across (and my handy-dandy little notebook), I have some awesome quotes to share from the last few weeks.

Note:  I did not keep track of who said what, so I will not give individual credit for each quote. However, please know that I did not (and probably could not) say anything nearly as incredible as these people.

“God is a God of time. He is not early or late.”

“We’re not here to fix Africa. We are here to listen, learn, and maybe go back and fix our own society and church.”

“The essence of traveling is not to find places that remind you of home. It is meant to expose you to different things and ways of life.”

“Motho o boteng” (In Setswana, this means “person is deep”)

“Time is an opportunity to strengthen/deepen a relationship.”

“In the US, the time determines the event. In Africa, the event determines the time.”

“When we don’t make time for God, time becomes our God.”

“I’m here to love God and my neighbor, whatever that means.”

“The problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue, but that they are incomplete.”

“You are here to learn how to live with humanity.”

“Spend time with people. Even if they differ in color and culture, they are still in the image of God.”

“Out of every nonsense, there is a sense.”

Time to Catch Up!

Wow! These last few weeks have been a whirlwind. First of all, on August 14^th, I left home and flew to Chicago for a week of in-country orientation with all 60 of the 2013-2014 YAGM volunteers. That week was so incredible, and filled with good conversations and even better people. I am truly blessed to be able to join in the journeys of the other 59 YAGMs. You guys are so great. J

After saying some tearful goodbyes (yes, even I cried when I had to say goodbye… that shows how much we care for each other), myself and the other 9 South Africa volunteers flew on the second-largest plane I have ever seen to Frankfurt, Germany. After a fairly long layover, in which some of us took to exploring the city of Frankfurt, we left on the largest plane I have ever seen in my life and flew to Johannesburg, South Africa!

After arriving here, we met up with our country coordinators, who are seriously awesome, and began to process what this year may look like for us. This past week was literally one of the greatest in my life. Not only was I exploring this beautiful country, but I was doing it alongside nine of the most incredible people. I am so grateful for the other nine South Africa YAGMs for making this transition smooth, enjoyable, and full of grace and kindness.

Now this brings me to the present. I have just arrived in Soweto, South Africa, which is where I will be spending the next 11 months! After spending probably too much time unpacking and finding homes for all of my t-shirts (why did I bring so many?), I had a great night of fellowship and food with a few of the other volunteers and staff with whom I will spend a lot of time. It was a great opportunity to learn more about the organization I will be working with (Diakonia AIDS Ministry or DAM) and the city that has now become my home. Just as I was feeling sad about saying goodbye to my wonderful YAGM community, God has provided me with another community here in Soweto. How cool, right?!

Whew, that was a lot. Sorry about writing a novel-length post, but I felt bad about not posting at all since I left home! Hopefully this has given you all a glimpse into my life for the last 2 ½ weeks. Soon, I will begin posting about my daily life here in Soweto! Ahh!

Lots of love,

Emily J